Feminist Rewrites The Lyrics to “Holding Out For A Hero”

New Lyrics

Where have all the good men (or women) gone
And where are all the gods (or goddesses)?
Where’s the street-wise Hercules (or Xena)
To fight the rising odds?
Isn’t there a white (or black) knight upon a fiery steed?
Late at night I toss and I turn and I dream of what I need (lowered FDNY test standards)

I need a hero! (maybe)
I’m holding out for a hero ’til the end of the night (I’m capable of saving myself)
He or she has gotta be strong
And he/she’s gotta be fast
And he/she’s gotta be fresh from the fight (fighting is so barbaric)
I need a hero
I’m holding out for a hero ’til the morning light
He/she’s gotta be sure
And it’s gotta be soon
And he/she’s gotta be larger than life

Somewhere after midnight
In my wildest fantasy
Somewhere just beyond my reach
There’s someone reaching back for me
Racing on the thunder and rising with the heat
It’s gonna take a superman (or superwoman) to sweep me off my feet

Original Lyrics

Where have all the good men gone
And where are all the gods?
Where’s the street-wise Hercules
To fight the rising odds?
Isn’t there a white knight upon a fiery steed?
Late at night I toss and I turn and I dream of what I need

[Chorus:]
I need a hero
I’m holding out for a hero ’til the end of the night
He’s gotta be strong
And he’s gotta be fast
And he’s gotta be fresh from the fight
I need a hero
I’m holding out for a hero ’til the morning light
He’s gotta be sure
And it’s gotta be soon
And he’s gotta be larger than life

Somewhere after midnight
In my wildest fantasy
Somewhere just beyond my reach
There’s someone reaching back for me
Racing on the thunder and rising with the heat
It’s gonna take a superman to sweep me off my feet

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Steven B

Veteran. Grandfather. Student of History. Former Medical Imaging Engineer

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